Friday, July 17, 2009

The Constipated White People of America

Listening to Pat Buchanan, and others like him lately, all I can think about is these people suffering from a serious case of constipation.

No, seriously.

Have you ever been constipated?
Have you ever gone 3 or more days without a bowel movement?

Chances are everyone has. And it's never a good feeling. You can't eat properly. You can't sleep properly. You body doesn't function properly. Your clothes don't fit properly. You just pretty much feel like you're gonna explode and all you want is relief.

Now imagine you've been constipated since.....oh let's say....January 20, 2009. Hell, you might even say as long as November 4, 2008. Imagine what type of agony these people are going through.

I've pretty much just described every racist white person in America.

And what made them constipated, you ask?

A black man named BARACK HUSSEIN OBAMA is President of the United States of America.

Obama and his black family sitting in the WHITE house destroys everything these people ever believed to be true about themselves and others.

It has literally made them constipated and every time they think they're about to get relief, they see Obama's black face on TV, in the magazine shelves at the grocery store, somewhere on the street, and their sphincters just tighten back up. It's like torture.

So with all that crap built up and driving them insane, the only way it can come out is through uncontrollable and spastastic burst which, while providing some relief, usually ends with the person having crapped all over themselves.

Put it to you like this. Do you really think the kiddies in FREEPERSville didn't know in the back of their minds throw racist, hateful slurs at Malia Obama, an 11 year old girl, wasn't making them look like huge assholes? Of course they knew, but at that moment all that were going through their mind was "I NEED RELIEF!!!!!!"

This is why you're seeing the racism towards Obama and his family literally come out in explosive blurts and stream (not unlike diarrhea). It comes out in a way that you can't even try to hide that it's racist. It's far too blatant and far too sloppy.

I use this far out analogy to make this point. Whenever you see or hear someone like Buchanan, or Hannity, or Limbaugh make huge assholes out of themselves, just think about the pain and misery they're going and know the dumps they're taking always end up making them look like shit.

1 comment:

Muzikal203 said...

They have been constipated since AT LEAST August 2008 at the end of that DNC convention. They thought they had some hope when Palin was announced, but they simply realized she was more like a developing kidney stone (which they STILL haven't passed by the way) with all of that, it's no wonder they are the way they are.